Memory on the Spring Festival

Memory on the Spring Festival
Spend the Spring Festival now, think that there is not a little meaning.

Stay and can not forget in memory forever on the Spring Festival in childhood.

I have impression six probably, at the age of seven, it remembers to be too cured 8 spending the Spring Festival, mother begin, busy with work, want, steam a lot of steamed bun first, or square steamed bun getting different with now round that town buy certainly. The steamed bun of the hometown does not actually call the steamed bun, fashionlifeand does not do it in this way at ordinary times, will do it in this way when only and call on relatives in great festival. Whom mother steam ask date spend, another kind call cake. Get loin chop each time, mother begin to be busy early, congenital to take place the higher authority evening, it was very early from the next day, steam with good neighbour of several relations. Stove smoked pitch-dark kitchen, man pigeonhole surface, woman pinch date spend in neighbour’s, the child that I am similar to a gang of ages went to the room to have a look a moment later, the ones that ran again had no trace for a moment, in a word parents leave the child alone this day, perhaps can not be in charge of. Cake that mother steam for offering a sacrifice to an ancestor mainly, when I am young, when great examination for entering school of running into, mother want, steam pieces of cake hold a memorial ceremony for, steam, familiar with cake on purpose, it is for let son for mother not to say "  Promotion " Ah.

Date spend cake, mother steam every year now, have one now such as thing already, the country-fellow shouts "   Steam yellowly " ,Which it is two word I uncertainly, take two word these right away tentatively too. It is actually made of maize flour, just wraps up and clicks falling into inside, there are Chinese cabbages, have white turnip and so on too, but I like, take especially as a child, until I leave house before receiving the undergraduate education in the county town, the staple food at ordinary times of our family is maize flour sorghum and maize flour porridge, my often hydrochloric acid in gastric juice eaten. The those years when Tianjin worked, sometimes go to hotel for meals with friend, someone loves some doses of buns and boils the small fish very much, I see the bun made of maize flour always taken. Villages and small towns Yang of Tianjin have one stick to bun endure small fish to be very famous, city someone goes to there to take by car, friend and I went back to Tianjin from Chengde one year, they wanted to eat the sticking to the bun and boiling the small fish of the Yang ’s, whom the bun stick to very kind, but I take one either. Special to the maize flour in the memory of childhood to conflict, this kind lasts a lot of years to conflict.

It arrives to be child excited a when most in New Year’s Eve, I had no TV to watch in the childhood, there is no Spring Festival Party even more, the dumplings of the 30 evenings are being well done that just waiting, it’s time for me to blow out. But the dumpling that the head pan is boiled is not to allow food, hold a memorial ceremony for immortal and ancestor first, mother holds two dumplings and a little soup in each bowl, younger sisters of younger brother and I place end on the place where mother burns joss sticks, some are at the gate, some are in the courtyard, some is in the centre of the central room, then should blow out, I eldest of family, boy, thing that blow out come by me certainly, young I seven year old of younger brothers want, take over I heavy burden of blowing out, but I have never stepped aside, until I have no interest in blowing out. I have been remembering the thing held a memorial ceremony for as a child all the time, but did not know who and hold a memorial ceremony for, I ask mother a lot of years later, she says with a smile, who in fact it is held a memorial ceremony for that she is not clear either, where to learn to come from the old man, in order to earnestly hope whole family’s safe happiness in the coming year is done in this way. Only mother is still repeating such an activity every year till now, because only in this way she could think the psychology peaceful.

There is a thing and was looked forward to by me in the 30 evenings, that is to wear the new clothes, the family was poor in the childhood, children made new garment while celebrating the New Year, and wore before not allowing annually, should not be taken out until 30 evenings. Before sleeping, mother took the new clothes out, changed the old clothes, it is being sleeping that I am smelling that perfume of the faint cotton cloth of the new clothes.

Very early in childhood heavy the beginning of the year, hear report stand up, run in new garment that mum finished changing out, have gone to pay New Year call to the elders to several children of the same age. Pay New Year call we call, kowtow, that to kneel in whom ground kowtow really as a child, sometimes the adult banters us on purpose, will not sound the head to the present, say it is a present, it is in fact a candy or a handful of peanuts and so on, but a very special present for us. Ones that pay New Year call very exquisitely in the countryside, pay New Year call to one’s own recent relative first, then other relatives that one is surnamed, the last neighbour of the different surname, but does not pay New Year call to the person lower than oneself. My seniority in the family to the neighbour in the childhood is always divided not very clear, often go to the neighbour’s lower than one’s own seniority in the family to pay New Year call with the companions, offend the jokes of adults. Does something if the children all liberate this day of the first day, nearly what is wanted to do, the adult does not interfere, I am often and the companions do the game between us.

Come home the second day day, grandmother house from the getting closer very,I that grandmother bring not heavy, so went to the old native place early in the morning, it was an unrestrained day there, by the fifth day, the adults should go to work, we will start a new term soon too, have just gone far from us annually gradually. 
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The most important happiness

 The most important happiness
Go through so much trials and hardships, has let me understand a lot of things, perhaps only give up some can not belong to one’s own thing, it is happy!
Year after year of time passed by, in a new year, only think of the work hard, do oneself thing of this copy well, let mother have a good time a bit, happy any. It is I it is the most in happy,most been for I for happiness important! Mother has paid too much for me, is have no injury of time for younger brother and me, it is what nobody can understand and realize and get. No matter I will how work hard, fatigue. I will let mother live a bit more happily too, a bit more happy. An unfortunate marriage, there is too much injury given to mother; One husband of person in charge, give mum too many feeling sad; A daddy responsible for the event that children no, what is the helplessness making people too much, let people experience incomparable heart pain too.
A woman’s life, if one’s own way is choosing by oneself, even wrong, there is not a meaning regretted. But the destiny that can change obviously, cannot change oneself, can make oneself to be any happy obviously, why go, choose, let life that oneself live a happy life, why go to choose the wrong way? Mother, I do not really understand! Do not understand   Perhaps you are for your relative! Perhaps it is other reasons? No matter what reason, I really can’t understand why is you silly then, it is you that have too soft heart, or do not you want to see relative’s agony? You take happiness for all one’s own life come, gain relative to be calm to live a life perhaps! Till to now, time temper let gradually I understand original helplessness and unfortunate, you of mum, from me. Though your marriage is that a tragedy came, brought the irretrievable injury to you, bring a lot of injury to younger brother and me too! It display by you before eyes we it is with,do we like this, not want to let you worry about us again, is injured for us! I really fear very much you are tortured and tired for us again, I can not really bear! Mum, you daughter have heavy ability let you kind life at material very, but I will reach the daughter’s duty of doing to the limit, I will make you happy, happy with pair with one’s own greatest efforts!
Perhaps has gone through a lot of things, will let me understand the happy and goal that I will pursue, the life is not alone! The happiness is not alone! Perhaps only expected in the past how well oneself had. But getting different in now, people grow up perhaps, thing that know how too more!
Mother is still working now, work too very hard, is looking at the work such as mother, there is a kind of feeling sad and regret that can not say in my heart! Mother really works too hard, work too hard! I know the work hard, mother, try hard to make you happy! You should believe your daughter, because of your happiness, is daughter’s greatest comfort and happiness!
Mum, the daughter loves you eternally! Daughter’s greatest happiness has you such a good mother, if had next life, I will become your daughter

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